Dear Luca

Dear Luca,

This day last year was your due date, today you would have been one.  I know we have been caught up lately with our sadness of losing your little sister, but I want you to know how much we love and miss YOU.  You of course are the little girl (or maybe little boy, you can give us a hard time when we meet in Heaven if we were wrong) who made us mommy and daddy. We were so overjoyed when we found out you were coming, when that little stick showed two lines.  It was one of our happiest days when we first saw your heart beat on the ultrasound screen and it tore us apart three months later when it was no longer there.

We miss you so very much. We so very much wish that today we would be watching you try your birthday cake (and most likely getting more on your face than in your mouth) and watching you open presents.  But instead we visited you at the cemetery and left you flowers there.

We did our best to celebrate you even though we are sad, sad that we don't have you and that we don't have your sister.  But I am eased a bit knowing that you were there to meet Elisa when she joined you in Heaven in January, and my heart is comforted knowing you two are together.

If you were here today, the house would be filled with laughter, and you may even be walking by now!  Know that I love you so very much and I think about you and miss you every single day.

Love, Mommy

We made you a birthday cake, lit your candle and sang you happy birthday! It is funnfetti cake (your daddy's favorite and was also the top layer of our wedding cake! He said he thinks it would be your favorite too)

After we had cake, we lit your sister's candle too, and then listened to the Cathedral
Compline service on the radio